Saturday, August 14, 2010

part 9 (feeling yuck)

TFT's and B12 functioning perfectly, best in years, which is why I got pregnant without medication. Well this baby is fine and healthy, feeling sick and tired very early in pregnancy. Ah sure, yea, all Mr fabulouss therapies start, New county, Dublin, another county. Oh for the love of god, 3 hour drive, 2 hour drive, half hour drive, I’m really exhausted now. I’m shown all the stretches for Mr fabulouss feet, all the OT, all the speech and language stuff. Oh god it’s just all too exhausting.

I have now bought my reports folder for Crazy jane, you know that wonderful folder we all resort to when we need to shout at the MEDICAL BOARD, Dept of ED, yep that folder. I ring Prof and make that wonderful appointment. My self and DH had a few off moments with this one, but he knows all too well we have to do it.

We head up to Dublin, yes we get lost again, how, god knows but we’re lost. In we go, have I met you before, yes you have, was it for a little boy, yes it was. Anyway, I’m used to him now; he’s odd but charming, bla bla bla. He reads through Crazy jane ED PSYCH report, why couldn’t they IQ her, I don’t actually know, something to do with discrepancies in different areas. Anyway he’s harping on, I could hear Crazy jane singing and dancing in the waiting room, I hear a crash, doh, I throw my head outside the door, the lunatic has banged into his Big book shelf,, sit down I say with a stern low voice.

The prof asks tonnes of questions, he remembers the family history, he waffles on and on, ah yes, the many pages, I see ADHD, ADD, Ritalin, ODD, Aspergers. Fuck, there it was, black and white. I asked the prof, are you sure, NO but I will be after I talk to her.

Crazy jane goes in, I hear a giggle from the prof (does he giggle i ask my self?) His door in not completely soundproof but you can't hear much. Crazy jane and him have been there for a while. Finally she comes out, you can go in now, and she’s smiling. She's a lovely child, so warm and friendly. What an unusual accent she has, really charming girl. She has Aspergers, she’s very conversation dominant isn't she, I found it hard to join in with her he said. She's quite taken with animals, Crazy jane went on to ask the Prof if he had pets, he said no that he has very little time for them, Crazy jane then went on to tell him, then a bunny or a hamster would be a great pet for him as low maintenance, he should not get a dog, but a cat would be good, and on and on, oh and a snake.

Crazy jane was diagnosed with Aspergers, ADD, ODD, Dyspraxia with sensory processing issues. She was referred by the Prof to a medical tem in our county. DH is finding it so hard to deal with, he says over and over, I don’t think she has Aspergers, look she's not doing this, that the other etc, as we thrall through the web sites. I think I’ve accepted it as I do see these things in her, and it answers my questions perfectly, although she is not severe, mild if anything. You see DH is German so he would not read her social awkwardness like I can, he would not hear her speech problems, nor her accent, thoe I only can sometimes also.

In the mean time I’m back and forth most of the week with Mr fabulouss appointments, my friend Siobhan with me as she’s learning his programmes also. Home tuition is looming, he will be entitled soon, have to start looking for a tutor. Was hoping (well praying Siobhan could do it, but every time we come up with a solution there is something in the way that we cant get round Dept of ED with.) Siobhan is still working with him 10 hours a week as part of the Organisation for now. We are allowed to use the organisations resource centre as he will do nothing at home. We are following an ABA programme especially written for Mr fabulous, although not as strict as was implied. I nearly go into a coma type sleep in their sensory room, that bubble tube is amazing and calming.

I’m still on rollercoaster getting advice and support from the girls. I’m exhausted, all this while being pregnant is sooo tiring, but I won’t moan about it. I try everything I can to keep up with everything but the housework is killing me. Its just too much, I’m starting to get down a good bit as I hate my house to be in bits, wash baskets full to the top, dishes everywhere, you see I’m a bit like Monica from friends, but not AS bad. I actually can’t cope with my exhaustion. I start trying to have a nap during the day, but then when I nap, the house work piles up twice as much, I just can’t win.

If by some miracle, a note comes through my door, Lady available to mind kids and do housework. DH says, were doing it, not to mind the kids but for the house work, ok Hun, its so expensive, but we don’t smoke, we don’t drink (well hardly ever) and when can we get out for a night, so screw it, we’ll do it. A wonderful Brazilian lady called Vilma showed up, I love her, she’s sooo nice, she’s playing with Mr fabulous, Mr fabulous likes her, he’s smiling at her, and he’s looking for more tickles. I’m blown away at how Mr fabulous takes to her. She comes in twice a week for 3 hours. I love when she’s here as she makes me go for a nap, she minds Mr fabulous, DH is here anyway working down stairs. My wash baskets are manageable, she irons (I never did that anyway) my house is sterile it’s that clean, oh are you supposed to dust the top f curtain rails EVERY WEEK? Where does this woman 15 years older than me get her energy, she’s bursting with the stuff.

Just to get a nap twice a week is rebooting my energy levels. It also gives me time to think and research on the net. How did I get pregnant so easily, why is my thyroid working so well now, how come my B12 is at a good working level???? I talk to the endocrine team in the new hospital, I ask the same questions. Sometimes this happens, having a baby can knock your system so out of whack, and then another baby can put it all back in working order again. hmmmm I get to thinking, what if I actually do not have a fertility problem, what if I actually had a thyroid problem when trying to get pregnant on Crazy jane but it just went unfounded, I ask the doctor who is starting to get a bit stressed with me lol. Yes its very possible, hmmmmm i put two and two together. Ok so if my thyroid was a bit dodge round Crazy jane time, I couldn’t conceive, and although it wasn’t severe under maybe that’s why Crazy jane was only mildly affected, as in Aspergers, and because it was so severe on Mr fabulous he was Autistic and badly affected, it might have nothing to do with nothing but it makes sense in my head for my reasons.

As my thyroid was perfect on baby no 3, I’m in a good place, this baby will be ok, I think this baby will escape the spectrum, I think he’ll be just fine. All my scans are perfect, I speak to the midwife. I explain I want a section, well dear, you won’t get one, and you have no need for one. Oh no you see I do, I’m afraid of giving birth after Crazy jane (miss natural no pain relief split me in half birth) No dear, the doctor your under wont hear of it. Oh shit, I’m panicking, the nurse sees the panic, dear are you ok? Nope I’m almost white and having a panic attack. She quietly advises me to change the doctor I’m under to a wonderful man . Ok I’ll do that. Done, changed over, app in 4 weeks time.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lovin the blogs Maddy cant wait for the next one xxxxx

9 hours ago •

December 19, 2009 2:36 AM

Anonymous said...

i never forget that phone call, shock horror haha

to posh to push haha
A xx

January 6, 2010 3:48 AM

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