part 23 Trigger Happy

So why Triggers for the post name LOL heres why
So you plod along nicely with Autism and Aspergers, oh let’s not forget Brat baby and its hard but you keep plodding along then PLOP, SLAP, THUMP, BANG, it slaps you right in the nut and you are knocked for six. Triggers yes, but somebody pull the trigger and send me to my resting place PLEASE.

So we finally get to the bottom of the biting episode, Mr fabulous’s way of saying I’m not ready for playschool thanks very much. Yes as soon as we took him out, biting stopped and I got my cool, happy, easy going baby boy back, yes Mr fabulouss back in top form and doing great again. That simple, just didn’t want to go to play school, who knew lol so trigger found and all sorted.

To top that off I get a letter from Department Of Education to tell me that as Mr fabulous will be 4 in July that THEY feel his educational needs would be better met in a MAINSTREAM SCHOOL, yes you heard me right, a mainstream school, well they were lucky I didn’t open that letter till 6PM as I’m only an hour away from their offices, and by god I would have hunted the letter signature person B M yes you all know her well down, and I would have plopped Mr fabulous down on her desk and said REALLY, YOU THINK? How insulting and in your face was that letter, well em like how do you figure?? C***S!! then I would have went to financial and grabbed the joy of the department by the neck and shook her till I shook my tutors Home Tuition payment out of them, grrrrr what a useless, wasteful bunch of F*****s they all are.

On that note lol Mr fabulous actually went to the toilet in his special needs preschool, still will not sit on the loo at home as they have small loo there and he’s too nervous to sit up on a higher up loo but he did it, he did his first wee. Was so happy, I’m really hoping we can get him used to big loo now here at home.

Crazy jane had a very bad melt down the other day. It came from nowhere and in public view and also in front of my 2 friends. It all started over her getting excited then confused then panicked and then bang to the ground as she fell while in temper. She didn’t feel a thing until the next day either. She came down heavy on her face, it slid on the path and then her knee and her just recently broken elbow followed. It was such a nasty fall too. But I had to let loose on her in view of all who passed by and my 2 friends, it was not pleasant for anyone. I got so upset as I felt like I had failed her so badly. She has no services and no matter what I do to try get her one it fails, and it's not my fault at all its that pr**k Dr Rogers fault but again, I am her mum, and I cannot win with this son of a bitch no matter what I do so the failure and guilt card was dealt.

My poor friend Aine felt so sorry for Crazy jane and so did I. It’s embarrassing for Crazy jane to show this side of her and she fights hard not to let it come out, she’s very good at handling herself but just once every while she can’t and a major melt down occurs. This is why her supposed mental health service refuse to acknowledge that she has Aspergers even thou they never properly well actually assessed her. It’s not obvious, it does not stand out you have to see it and search for it. So her trigger, chronic tiredness. She was shattered, sleepless nights due to Lunatic john, up at 7.30 every Saturday for CTYI, she had a sleep over and was up at the mental hour of 7 am the following day, her friend is an early riser, Crazy jane IS NOT lol, but to be polite and courteous to her friend she got up with her and they had a good girlie laugh and giggle but then it just caught up on her later on and continued catching up on her during the week.

I have been working non stop lately and I’m exhausted. But when I take a break I just remember the amount of crap still left that we have to do for The creativity centre and I just keep working to try getting it done. We went shopping for a load of stuff the other day so that was cool, we picked our colour scheme and bought our couch, paint and sofas, then we got our cushions and stuff for the baby section which is gorgeous. I’m really looking forward to this, plus if I’m honest I need it as it’s my escape from the mammy bubble and then even more so from the mammy of 2 special needs, possibly 3 kids bubble.

I feel like such a neglectful friend to all my Face Book friends and our support network especially. I’m out of the loop with you all and I’m loosing track of blogs etc, but I’m slowly catching up again. Just know that I’m missing you all and I’ll be back to my usual non neglectful self soon and you’ll be sick of my regular status updates again lol. I’m thinking of you all, especially those who are sick at the min and have sick kids or to those of you having trouble with the services etc. I’m still hear supporting you and wishing you well xx

Today was an odd day for me. I woke at 7 in a bit of a panic as Mr fabulous was not awake yet, you see he’s up at 6.30 eeeeeeing , oooooooing and aaaaaaaaaing out of him at the top of his lungs and banging the window at the cat every morning. I got that eeeerie feeling again, yes I opened the door to find my baby in his bed with that funny shaped mouth again, the milk bottle complexion, the creamy coloured lips and blank expression, but this time he was just coming through it so did not look dead and feel ice cold and stiff. He had had another seizure. But I wasn’t panicked or scared; he was sooo tired and sleepy that I knew he was ok so I let him sleep. I had the monitor plugged in down stairs and I checked him regularly. I refused to go to the hospital as they could do no more than what I could do and he was able to be in his own bed, with his teddies, his own blankets and pillow and with no added noise than usual. He was happier that way. It took till 2 pm and a bit of gentle persuasion for him to get out of bed, but up he got and ate a big bowl of his favourite food, chicken noodles and he hasn’t stopped eating and giving out since, he’s back to his usual self. I reckon ill be too stressed to sleep tonight thou as ill be listening out and watching him like a hawk but I don’t care.

Lunatic john had all his bloods done a few weeks ago and he is being tested for Cystic Fibrosis, thyroid dysfunction, Live, Kidney, bladder function, haemoglobin count, anaemia, well everything really. The hospital is really pleased with his weight gain. He has gained just under 2 pound in 4 months, better than nothing as they say. He’s sleeping a little better, still a nightmare but less of one lol. I’ve gotten a great break from his constant whinging and horrendous squealing over the last few weeks as my mum has been minding him while I’m getting stuff done for The creativity centre. It’s been great to get that break. I’ve missed him loads but knew we both needed it.

My own health is a bit messed up as well. My thyroid packed in a good bit and I’ve been put on a new higher dose of eltroxin. I was so tired and just kept putting on weight and not shifting it no matter how little I ate. I also developed a pregnant belly look as my IBS was acting up. I looked like death walking, no matter how much I washed my hair it looked greasy. My skin looks dreadful and dehydrated. Ah I’m a wreck, yuck but I’m on the right track now and getting better. I got my hair chopped and layered again like I used to have and got my blond and copper highlights back in, I look so much healthier now with a lighter hair colour.

Just to add to things, my hamster Linnie whom I adore almost had a trip to the vet, his eye turned red and the vet said he could lose it yet, apparently hamsters develop glychoma for no reason and their eye bulges and pops out. Me and Crazy jane had dibs on which unfortunate got to take the eye out of the cage lol, then his eye went back to normal, now its red again, stupid hamster, I don’t know a MAD HOUSE I tell you. Then my stupid cat was stinking, I mean real bad, so I put it in the car and headed for the vet, went to turn the corner and couldn’t press my clutch, yes the cat had crawled under it, Jesus Christ had to slow the car down and hand break it to stop, stupid cat. Then he got some injections for gastric. I don’t know, now I got vet appointments as well as hospital and clinic appointments etc PML. Ahhh yes my life, want to trade places hehe

8 comments:

Jen said...

I have been thinking about you as I do miss your updates on FB. Its great to be filled in even though, yes girl, you do have a mad house. Take it easy (yeah I know, sorry, impossible)and hope The creativity centre goes really well:) Seriously impressed with Mr fabulous doing a wee in the toilet:) Jen.

March 11, 2010 12:18 PM

Anonymous said...

Helen Doyle Fitzgerald dont give up,your so brave and keep smiling.

March 11, 2010 12:50 PM

Anonymous said...

Joanne Mulvey Lovedthis bog...brill...thanks maddy

March 11, 2010 1:14 PM

Anonymous said...

Sandra Reilly I dont' know how you do it all - you're pretty frigging GREAT - you should have a big S tatooed onto your chest !!!!

Me lol no better that the rest of us chicks, we should all get one of them tattoed on

March 11, 2010 1:30 PM

Looking for Blue Scrazy jane said...

You are just amazing, you have sooo much energy, reading your blog is better than Red Bull, I'm now wide awake, just as well as so are all 3 upstairs, off to do the rounds now with a smile on my face picturing the cat under the clutch lol!

March 11, 2010 1:42 PM

claireh said...

Maddy, how the hell do u do it all? Sorry to hear bout crazy jane but everyone has bad days. shes such a trooper, a fab little girl. Just a pity this country has let her down so bad!

Such a relief to hear the fit wasnt too bad. Slepp is the best thing afterwards as your head feels like its been hit by a truck!!

And im still so angry for you over that mainstream letter!! couldnt believe it, talk about taking the piss!

Iv so much admiration for you girl but slow down, your makin the rest of us look bad :)

March 11, 2010 1:46 PM

I said...

oh hun that cat, if it didnt need the vet before the trip, it did after lol

he was all cuddled up on the front seat then next i knew GONE hehe, it was a fun moment slowing a car in 5th gear down and trying to turn corner (sharp bend) in one peace, thank god for country roads and no traffice

March 11, 2010 3:32 PM

Autimom said...

you really are a busy bee lately, make sure you dont forget bout some you time ok pet. Hope crazy janera is doin fine now and hope she not too worried, sending big hugs to her, mr fabulouss & lunatic john, to all of ye xxx

March 11, 2010 5:03 PM