part 28 what the hell is happening here

Hi all, it’s been a while I know but for a reason, life has been hell lately, so hell that no energy to think let alone tell its story.

Ok so WHAT NOW??

The recent letter from Doctor Rogers I have told the majority of you anyway but for those I didn’t tell, well the spineless son of a bitch done something very nasty. So nasty it’s scary actually. This man chose to start war and boy he sunk to his lowest blow yet. What the fuck is his problem, seriously, I don’t get him, I always said he should not be a psychiatrist but yet seek psychiatry for his own mental issues but his latest blow just proves how right I am.

He gathered a handful of people who never met me, or else barely had a conversation with me, hell one was a school nurse who done an eye and vision test on Crazy jane once to a meeting and manipulated them into making a nasty decision about me and Crazy jane, again I cannot say much as I know the DICKHEAD reads this blog but he was vicious. he wasted a lot of Medical resources for this meeting, yes our kids had to be put on hold so he could perform his evil, a dca officer, an area medical officer, an area medical doctor, a school nurse, a speech and language manager, a speech and language therapist, and someone else I again DO NOT KNOW to a meeting. Now his concern as he states was the welfare of my daughter, hmmmmmmm and our relationship, huh, ok let me revise.

These people never met me or my daughter, they do not know us nor have a reason to be in our life. I maybe spoke once on the phone to arrange assessment, I think she had 3 sessions of s&l therapy and was told she wouldn’t get any more due to Asperger’s diagnosis as she was now Dr Rogers problem again. A dca officer, well don’t we all know them and yes I had to beg for money from her, DENIED the area medical doctor who referred her for NEPS Psychology to begin with yada yads bla bla

So does that qualify them to know me and my daughter, our relationship, our family life and struggles , fuck no it does not, these people have jobs to do yet they chose to come to this meeting, FOR WHAT cause they where dragged to it. Isn’t it funny how they never invited S***s Psych, you know the one who carried out her Cognitive Psych assessment, the S***s OT and Speech and language therapist, you know the ones who carried out the MULTI D to diagnose Asperger’s. Isn’t it funny how he had all of Crazy jane’s reports at his finger tips yet he never chose to bring the 3 OT ‘s who assessed her to the meeting, the 3 Speech and Language therapists who assessed her to the meeting, the other 2 psychologists to the meeting, the NEPS Psychologist who originally suspected Asperger’s to the meeting, My social Worker from Mr fabulous’s services (you know the family social worker) crazy jane’s teachers / Principle to the meeting

Yea taught that would amaze you, as it sure as hell amazed me too.

The conclusion: we are now referred to Social Services as he fears for Crazy jane’s emotional well being due to her relationship with me, Have you ever heard such a load of bullshit in your life. That child is the best looked after; her needs are met by me daily as she has no services here due to his irresponsible way of thinking, so I am her services, S&L OT Psych etc. I am BROKE trying to keep her entertained, educated, stimulated. I Joined forces with 2 other woman and created The Creativity Mill as I saw it as an opportunity to compliment both Mr fabulous’s and Crazy jane’s therapies, educational needs, occupational therapy needs, social interaction needs, entertainment needs, emotional well being needs, everything. Crazy jane participates in summer camps, art classes, Saturday club, and Glee club everything. She is the happiest she has been in such a long time. I have employed a psychologist to work with both Crazy jane and Mr fabulous just to make sure they have the best of all their needs met. I’m broke as I volunteer my time to The Creativity Mill, I do not get paid. I am putting my heart and soul into everything I can for MY KIDS, I have no life, as my life is my kids. I’m run ragged trying to devote my time, love, affection and attention between 3 very high needs and dependant children. I’m financially fucked as every penny I have goes on my 3 children. I’m physically and mentally exhausted DAILY making sure my kids are looked after, entertained, fed, bathed, their therapies are done, their appointments are scheduled, I have childcare so I can attend their appointments yada yada and this is the praise and thanks I get.

I have no problem printing this on the web either as anyone who knows me knows all to well that what he’s trying to do is bollix. I know in my heart that I am a great mother and I never prioritise anything above my children. Even my life and happiness comes second to my children’s. I am a great mother who is run ragged trying to fight this poxy system to make sure her children are given everything they are entitled to, it seems to me the more you fight the harder you fall, at least it is with me. I’m sick of fighting, I’m sick of filling in applications, I’m sick of praying my kids will get stuff they should be getting, I’m sick of worrying about the future, I’m sick of needing to keep a diary so I can remember all of my appointments and arrangements. I’m sick of having to plan 3 months in advance for EVERYTHING. Can someone tell me does this get easier, does it settle down eventually? I’m sick to death or trying to be so in control of my life as my kids need me to be. I’m sick of trying to keep everyone happy and splitting my self in 3 so that each child has the same amount of my time love affection and attention.

I am so angry that this son of a bitch has the power to hurt me the way he does. I could seriously physically hurt him but id be arrested but yet he gets to torture, emotionally and mentally abuse me like this and gets away with it. He gets to waste all of these medical professionals’ time and resources and gets away with it and all of those kids who need those resources get pushed aside for this. And now he is going to waste social services time, all those poor children who need social services and he is pushing them aside just to hurt me. There is a fine and punishment for people who make stupid calls to Social services, will he be punished and fined also, you bet your ass he won’t. New county abuse case anyone, does he not recall this case and see that social services have better things to be doing. ASSHOLE

I cannot wait for them to call to my house, see the chaos, the constant cleaning, the constant whinging for my attention, the amount of safety measures it takes to get through one day, tellies screwed to the wall, bed screwed to the floor, high fences to stop escape, blocked chimneys, stair gates, pecs cards, blocked off hobs, time schedules, calendar dates highlighted everywhere, daily time schedules, yes come to my house and maybe they will see that I actually need more help to cope with it all and realise that Dr Rogers was being a dickhead and give him hefty talking to and fine for wasting resources.

BRING IT you sick and twisted evil little man

7 comments:

Foodie Mummy said...

So sorry to hear about that! Is there no kind of complaint system in place? Are you not entitled to get second opinions anymore? If all those women that were told their babies were dead hadn't gone and gotten second opinions, they would never have had their children. What kind of country is this? One doctor that is so sure of his diagnosis that he'll bulldoze everything in his way to make it stand? That's just ridiculous. You are such a brave woman, taking on everything you take on and having to deal with such crap. I know it's hard but keep on fighting! If there is anything I can do, please don't hesitate to let me know! X

June 28, 2010 4:38 AM

Jen said...

I know I knew about this but it still shocks me that one person can be so vindictive and unprofessional. Keep going hun, you and you children are worth the battle one hundred times over and if ever there is anything I can do then you know where I am. Big hugs Jen xxx

June 28, 2010 7:46 AM

i said...

thanks girls, im just angry and hurt. it makes me feel worthless and that no matter what i do its just not good enough, i feel like i can never win, and having to cope with this on top of every day stuff and people and stupid carry on just makes me crumble to the pressure

im fighting still but at my own expense, im also at breaking point but thank you for the support, it means the world xxx

il get through it as i have all you fb buddies and great friends to help me

June 28, 2010 11:07 AM

Looking for Blue Sky said...

You are good enough, more than good enough, but there are some people who always enjoy a power trip and what better way than turning the screws on a family that is already stretched to the limit. Keep on fighting: I got there in the end with Smiley and hopefully you will as well xxx

June 28, 2010 2:32 PM

Petunia said...

Hang in there chick, he's definitely on a power trip and being vindictive. Anyone who knows you know this. Keep on fighting and know that we are behind you xxx

June 29, 2010 2:32 PM

jazzygal said...

You are worth a lot more than this Maddy! I knew about this too but like Jen says, it's shocking to see it detailed like this.

I'm inclined to go with the second opinion option, like Foodie Mummy says. Also, the MEDICAL BOARD have complaints procedures in place if you're not happy with the treatment you have received... most organisations do. Maybe you could examine that, get some advice and maybe make a pre-emptive strike ;-)

Yea...I know...ANOTHER battle. Such a pain!

Best of luck with it....repeat after me : I am a great mum.... I am a great mum....!

xx Jazzy

June 29, 2010 3:33 PM

Momx3 said...

OMG Maddy, I didn't realise you were going through all this. I've not had time to read any of the blogs for a while now, sorry!

Keep your head held high hunny. Its an absolute disgrace that you have to face all this on top of looking after your family.

Big hugs,xxx Vicki

July 3, 2010 3:33 AM